Joining A Fan Club
by Bob8644
Summary: After a shockingly brutal encounter with some burglars, Ratchet and Clank are taken hostage by two strangely obsessive individuals. Through their escape efforts, they find out how cruel and peculiar one's following can be when they hit it big.
1. I Predict A Riot

" Clank, where are they closing up on now? "

" I believe they just made a particularly sharp turn right. It should be around the shopping forum. "

" Got it, that should be up around- "

" Here. "

Ratchet and Clank finally managing to tail behind the escaping bolt burglars and put them directly into place at the corner of the street, thanks to the newly installed heat sensors into their speeder. The craft barely nudged the criminals' speeder out of control as the vehicle almost slammed right into a pole. The Fongoid vigilantes jumped out of the car and got the heck out of dodge immediately. Ratchet hopped out as Clank jumped on with him as Ratchet began to pursue the robbers.

Clank activated his boosters as Ratchet began to close in. " Almost there, let's go, pal! "

" As you wish, " gallantly replied his robot friend as he began to speed up. " We are beginning to close in, Ratchet….50….40….25...10… "

 _BAM!_

Ratchet grabbed onto one of the robbers' waist as he tackled him with sheer force, the two spinning across the sidewalk as bystanders and shoppers ducked into nearby shops and recklessly into the street, creating a huge traffic jam, but still rightfully so considering the situation at hand. This was certainly a big win for Ratchet.

Not so much for Clank.

Though he managed to….uh….not die(?), he was still taking a rough beating. As the two rolled around, the poor robot was scraped and bruised on the pavement; flakes of his precious metal were shaved off his adorable face, making a few people cringe at his torturous tumble. When Ratchet finally hit a stop, the two smacked into a pole in the road, with Clank being slightly crushed under Ratchet's back, flinging off it and smacked head first into a pole. Oof.

Ratchet had also taken his fair share of bruises, his fur scratched with scars here and there, and huge bruises lying on his palms. However, he was able to take the beating tougher than Clank did, as he immediately pointed his blaster at the criminal.

" 13 scandalous robberies, 2 counts of assault, 1 count of dirty dancing- "

" Pretty sure you made that up, " spouted the criminal as Ratchet socked him with his blaster.

" Archeus Joell...you are under arrest. "

" I guess you've beat me this time…. _this time. "_

Ratchet raised an eyebrow. " Excuse me? " he said. Ratchet liked to put on a sort of tough guy act on the streets. 

But things were flashing by way too quickly as Archeus reached into his pocket.

Clank had just caught this with the corner of his eye as he laid on the sidewalk, his limbs starting to degrade under the currently hot weather.

" R-RATCHET! LOOK OU- "

 _ **BOOM!**_

Archeus activated a secret bomb he kept in his pockets as Ratchet was blasted back by the sheer intensity of the blast, fortunately not fatally wounded due to his nanotech. He flung straight into the exact same pole where Clank laid in, A.K.A he flung right into Clank, crushing the poor bot even further as they both blackened out immediately.

As Ratchet attempted to gain conscience, his eyelids wavered up and down. People screamed and rioted through the streets. Police sirens and even some Ranger bots entered the city.

As Ratchet eventually lost consciousness, all he could see were two strange characters in hoods grabbing a bag and pulling it straight over his head as his hearing was immediately blackened.


	2. I Appear Missing

" _At approximately 12:19 PM, after a particularily deadly encounter, the two heroes Ratchet and Clank suddenly vanished without a trace during a dangerous robbery at the downtown shopping square at Kerwan. According to onlookers, Ratchet tackled the robber, then rolled across the sidewalk until they both slammed into a pole, as the burglar activated a bomb and the two were engulfed in a fiery explosion. When the smoke cleared, the two went unconscious and the two disappeared."_

" _They were both extremely beaten and scratched when they stopped rolling, it was horrible."_

" _Some dudes in black cloaks just came in and...they were gone."_

" _The robber has been pronounced dead as he himself disappeared with them. More stories to develop at 9. Also, I'm not wearing pants. More on this after the break."_

" Ugh...geez…what the he- "

Ratchet awoke to a blinding light as he found himself tied to a black chair, his wrists held down in rope. There was a large group of Fongolians gathered around him, as he noticed he was on a large, black stage.

" Wait...no, no, no, no, NO! " he shouted as he began to jump around and slowly panic more and more and also angry as he began to bite at the ropes fiercely, even though he knew he couldn't reach it. As he started to look as if he were a savage beast, the crowd cheered and cheered as he thrashed around in the chair, like he was a cage fighter of some sort.

 _God DAMN IT! Who the hell are these freaks?! They're the same species as that...robber...wait! WAIT! "_

" NNNNNGAAAAAAH! "

Ratchet screamed as he cut loose from the rope and he shouted a mighty Lombax roar. The crowd went berserk as Ratchet started to take huge breathes. He growled and laid on the floor as the onlookers cheered even more.

" Our leader has proven himself! "

" We have OBTAINED THAT OF WHICH IS A GOD! "

" I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON, BUT I'M JUST GONNA GO ALONG! WOOO! "

Ratchet gave off a puzzled look as he onlooked the crowd. " Wait, guys, hold on! " he shouted/commanded as everyone immediately shut up.

" My lord, what is it you wish to speak of? " one of them weakly asked. 

" Well...uh…. " Ratchet felt a bit flattered by the nickname. " I, uh, would like to ask, ahem...why am I here? "

" Oh, well, you see, my lord, we are a small nation of rogue Fongolian refugees, yes? " The crowed agreed and nodded their heads. " And we, eh, our leader, sir...Archeus Joell- "

" THAT guy?! The one who freaking blew himself up?! "

" Yes-he did…? That was him….? He blew himself up? "

" YES! " shouted Ratchet. " He freakin' went on a suicide mission and he was gone just like that! THAT'S YOUR LEADER?! "

" Yes, but- "

" That's it, YOU TERRORIST PUNKS ARE GOING DOWN! " He immediately jumped from the stage and pulled out his blaster. The crowd screamed in terror as some of them began to flee.

" No, no, wait! PLEASE! We had no idea he had gone and done that! "

" Are you sure about that, are YOU FREAKING SURE ABOUT THAT?! " He began to charge the blaster.

" YES, I SWEAR BY THE ZONI! " he yelled as he put his hands up. " I can explain everything! "

Ratchet kept the gun pointed, but lowered his expression, though he was still very angry. " Then do it, " he said, "and if I find out you're lying to me, you're _dead._ "


	3. The Joker

" … _.hmm…..oh my goodness, what…..is this...poor li…...oh god, why wo….."_

Clank slowly opened his eyes to a blinding light, or perhaps what he could see of that light if not for the figure standing over him. He shifted uncomfortably as he was unsettlingly poked and prodded at by a pair of tweezers on what he found to be a bed of some sort. There was a ripping pain almost everywhere as he moaned and shivered at their touch. If not for his condition, he would immediately be attempting to escape and pick a fight with anyone who decided to come across his path. The voice that he'd heard started to become much clearer...

 _" Oh...hey…..hey, bu….are you….._ **HEY! "**

 **" WAAUGH! "**

...and of course, louder.

Clank yelped and panickingly scurried away from the sudden harsh voice, the figure jumping in surprise as well. His optics blurred in a frenzy and his head smacked right into the top of the bed. He curled into a tightly-knit ball as he hid his face from the figure attempting to do whatever it is he or she were doing to him even more. He whined quite loudly as he could hear this figure stepping towards him, making a shushing noise and caressing his back.

" Shhh…..I'm sorry….hey, hey, it's fine...hello...Clank…? "

Clank quickly shot up and fell to the floor in shock. This stranger knows his name? She's speaking to him as if she were any companion of his, like Ratchet or Elaris or even Qwark. But the two of them, as far as he was concerned, had never met. What was this flattery and companionship she was showing to him?

The poor, worried robot lifted his head and observed the girl who stood above him. It was an almost short statured, almost 16-looking young Markazian woman with short, dark brown hair and a long white lab coat. She donned on her face round, trimmed glasses. She of course had an extremely worried expression on herself as she knelt down to take a look, caressing him more.

" There, there….you just woke up, okay? Everything's fine, little buddy. "

Clank used all his might to throw some words out of his mouth. " H-how exactly do you know me? Do we have some sort of...s-secret connection? "

Her face suddenly turned into a blank one as she starting to crack a smile, resulting in a long, satisfying laugh.

" Oh, Clank, how could I have not heard of you?! You're part of freaking RATCHET AND CLANK! The dynamic duo! The absolute madmen! The twin….okay, you don't have that many nicknames, but you get my point, right?! "

Clank scratched his head and then had a good chuckle himself, though he was still clutching his body tightly. " I suppose you are right on that part...but who exactly are you…? "

" Oh, I'm so sorry! " she proclaimed, lifting Clank carefully back onto the bed and rubbing his head. " My name's, er, Juliet, you can call me- "

" I believe the common nickname would be Julie- "

Clank was immediately interrupted by Julie pinching his " cheeks ".

" Oooh, of course that's what you were gonna say, heh heh! Right?... "

Clank had failed to produce any form of intelligent speech due to the current position of Julie's hands. Julie giggled and moved away immediately.

" Why am I here? What exactly makes someone like me, a mere robot, so special to one person like you? " asked Clank.

" Oh, uh, well, I mean…can you give me one second? "

Julie moved to the back of this empty room (Where even was he, Clank thought?) and opened a nearby door near what appeared to be a closet. She cleared her throat as she pulled out some decently sized cardboard boxes and sat them down on a nearby table.

"You see, I'm, well… "

She immediately opened them all up and revealed a treasure trove of what appeared to be dozens, possibly hundreds of collectible items and merchandise. Clank carefully leaned over to take a look and saw tons of figures, laniards, posters, comic books, you name it. It was certainly a weighty, worthy collection. There seemed to be one strange trend among them, however: it was all based on the lone robot himself, no Ratchet in sight.

" I am just such a HUGE fan of you! " she exclaimed with a bright smile. " Ever since I saw you on TV a couple years back in college, I was always so...intrigued by you! I collected tons of guides, books, and I read up on all that you were about! I know your favorite colors, books, TV shows...I thought you were so innocent, and, and _cute_ that I was just getting all these mixed feelings...so I, uh...crap…"

"May I ask one question, Julie? " asked Clank. " Why did you take me in in the first place? Anyone could have rescued me… "

" I was just, uh, taking a stroll through the shopping area to pick up lunch, this was right around the time the bomb went off...at the last second, I saw you and Ratchet get engulfed in that huge explosion and I couldn't help it! "

Clank knew something was clearly up. " Why didn't you take Ratchet also? " he asked. " Did you take him?! "

" Calm down, calm down, please...I think it may have been...someone else…? "

" What? Are you saying- "

" Clank, I'm so sorry, I really just want to see you get better right now! I took you in because I couldn't let you die, okay?! "

" Julie, I- " She immediately placed her finger between Clank's eyes as he whimpered cautiously, getting back to work on fixing the little robot's wounds and scrapes. As she began to wipe down one of his legs, she leaned in a bit and whispered to Clank somewhat aggressively:

" Let me tell you something, if you even try to move a muscle during this operation, buddy- "

She motioned a finger to the tip of his foot, sporting a devilish grin. She slightly moved it across as Clank giggled and reared his leg back, staring at Julie carefully.

 _" I've read my books. I know all your weakpoints. "_

Clank's " pupils " shrunk as he was immediately shut up for the rest of the procedure.


	4. Long Distance Call

" So, let me see if I get this correct, you guys have been trapped under here for, like, decades? And the rangers constantly try and take you in when you try and reveal yourself? And are all your guys just trying to get themselves in trouble? "

" That would seem so, yes. I can assure you we are not as troublesome as some of us can be. "

" Uhhh huh. Then why is it tha- "

" We need you to understand, good sire! Those troublesome rodents have nothing to do with us, I swear! "

" ...so be it. "

Ratchet was discussing the recent attacks and his current position with the strange Fongoid rebels in a white room with a few of the rebels. It was a pasty white colored quarters room with a fan slowly creaking above their heads, a few most likely priceless paintings hanging across the , the room used to be a The makeshit " tribe " had taken in Ratchet suddenly after realizing that his potential was limitless during that battle with the robbers.

" We were going to take in your small friend, too...but it seemed that he was gone, too, " the head Fongoid said.

" Wait WHAT?! " Ratchet yelled . " Who took him?! Did you see him or her?! "

" I'm afraid we did not...but they were also wearing one of those black robes… "

" They what?! THEY WERE WITH YOU?! "

The Fongoids backed up. " N-no, sir! " one of them yelped. " I don't know why they would be-uh….oh dear… "

" Way to go, Carl, " another Fongoid teased. " Now look what you've done. "

" Just hold on! What did they look like underneath that robe?! "

" It was er...a freckled girl...yes, it was one of those Mark...a...Markeez….Biz Mark-Kozel- "

" Markazians? "

" Yes, that's it! She had those glasses….hmm…. "

" Where did you last see her move to? "

" I believe she may have gone off to...somewhere in this tunnels. "

" So she's somewhere around here?! "

" Yes! Absolutely! Would you like to find her?! "

" Well, yes, but...wait… "

Ratchet started going through the room and rummaging through a few of the bags that had been left around, trying to find some weapons for the supposed trip. A Fongoloid pulled him right back.

" Sir, why are you looting through our items?! " he yelled.

" Listen, I-...I need to be prepared before we head off to this girl. Do we have any stocks or whatever? "

The flock of Fongoids nodded, exiting the room to find the storage closet of weapons, emergency rations, and other objects of perhaps little to no use...A groovitron, a blaster with some spare ammo...a Crotchicizer...wait, what was this…?

Ratchet took notice at the strange pole like object that was poking out of the closet as he hung behind the group. It was a long, iron rod with a strange orb being held on top of it. It was quite rusty and twisted, it most likely hadn't been used in years. It was almost like a child's plaything. The orb itself was a somewhat cracked light blue.

" What the heck is this? " the curious lombax said.

" Oh, now this is the main reason we brought you here. This is the Rod of….of… "

" There's no name. You didn't give it a name. "

" I don't think so, no. "

Ratchet slowly clapped. " So what does this do? "

" The rod is supposed t'be some sort of special object that only a select few can use...however, we have not found the correct wielder for it as of now. "

" How do you know if it has a correct...wielder? "

" It will emit a powerful glow like none have ever seen. Its power is limitless, but no one knows what it is."

" Geez, are you this skeptical about everything? "

" Sigh, I would think so… "

Ratchet shook his head, grabbed a few of the weapons, and headed out, the Fongoids trailing behind him. It was time to find out where his best friend was, and to see if these rebels had anything to do with it as well...


End file.
